I have never failed a single subject in school. I have never failed to completely something I started. I have never failed to cross the finish line.
I have one chance left to get this A in Chemistry or say hello to my first fail.
Hubby says it's ok, don't worry, don't panic. He says I'm smart and that he's proud of me for getting as far as I have and for not giving up when it seems hopeless. He says it's not failing if I hold my head up high and finish the subject completely. He says that sometimes we need to repeat stuff to understand it fully.
I guess he's right and I guess I should listen. Heh.
We said good bye to my mom today. We had early Christmas with her, so the girls could open their Christmas presents from her with her one last time. She cried and broke down, it was sad, but to be honest it all felt fake. I know my mother and I know how she likes to make things about her. ANYTHING. If you tell her about how you have a hang nail, she will suddenly cut you off to tell you about her horrible hang nail that she caught on a blanket and how much it hurts, oh feel bad for me. She did the same crap during my pregnancies and then my births.
I had my last daughter drug free and natural.... I'm not doing that again. LOL. But my mother will tell you how she almost had a heart attack and was so alone, while I was in the hospital giving birth. She didn't even know til the next day. UGH.
She likes to think that she still calls the shots with me. Like she says I'm done having kids, cause 2 is enough, Ummm No. Me and Hubby want 6 together total and then more with our second if she wants them.
When I was in the hospital with a serious blood infection and kidney issues a week after having my youngest daughter. My mother came and saw me and she complained that she didn't get to see my daughters, Umm they were allow at the hosiptal and if anyone should of complained I should of been. Here I was a week postpartum and sick in the ICU not sure if I will recover. Then the whole visit, she demanded to speak to my nurses to make sure they knew what I could or couldn't have and to know the status of my illness. Luckily for me, Hubby had already covered the bases at the hosiptal and signed the papers stating my info was between my doctors, me, and Hubby only. So the nurses just shooed her away and threated to kick her out. One nurse even told my mother that I was a big girl and she needed to keep her nose out of my business. I loved my nurses. LOL.
Wow, that felt like a load off my chest. I have been wanting to get this all off my chest for awhile and just RANT.
Thankies
Heather
3 comments:
Hang in there...you'll do great at school. I'm sitting here working on stupid essays for this communications course I made the mistake of taking. I really wish I could communicate that! lol. Really, it's my own fault for procrastinating. Ugh.
Not sure what to say about your Mom, but it sounds like it's for the best to just avoid the situation whenever possible.
Hang in there with your chemistry class!
I understand the situation with your mom: my mom is exactly the same way. I feel for you! When I told my mom I was raped when I was fourteen by a family friend, she said crying, "Oh my! My baby was not a virgin when she was married." ReallY? When I was in labor, she kept telling me about her deliveries and the pain she was feeling because I was going to have to have an emergency c-section. So I definitely feel for you!
Okay, dude. Seriously?
"I know my mother and I know how she likes to make things about her. ANYTHING. If you tell her about how you have a hang nail, she will suddenly cut you off to tell you about her horrible hang nail that she caught on a blanket and how much it hurts, oh feel bad for me. She did the same crap during my pregnancies and then my births."
First off, no offense, fuck that rude bitch. Step back for a moment and pretend she isn't your mom. Would you still talk to a cunt like that?
Yeah. You *know* the answer. :p I'm going to recommend that Narcissists Suck blog again{see my last post for the addy}. I KNOW, it's hella stupid to put so much into a blog, but that fucking blog HELLA helped me understand my female bio parent. It's also FULL of links full of useful info for children of narcissists.
And judging by Madame Steady's posts, she needs this link too! ;P
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